Ed Hardy and a Jesus Party

We visited a church today. We have been visiting churches for the past 3 months. I had no idea how difficult it is to find a church. Most likely the problem originates with how picky I am. I have never experienced what happened today. The name of the church will not be used to protect the innocent.

Arriving to this church, we immediately realize we were all extremely overdressed. And I was sure my heart flutter had returned. I made a mental note to make a cardiologist appointment. No, don't be silly Stacy, that is just the praise band inside. With an open mind I tried to focus on the good points of this church. I found that very difficult. First of all, the pastor is wearing an Ed Hardy t-shirt. He reminds me of Dane Cook, only less funny.

When I could actually hear him over the chitter chatter behind me, I couldn't believe what I was hearing. He actually used an example of being called to the principal's office. When he spoke of one's spiritual life at the work place he kept referring to a career in bagging groceries. Panicked, I began to look around. I was sure we had been misled into the wrong room, children's church. I was half right. Everyone around me was younger than me by 15 years. And they were ALL talking and texting. I don't how I composed myself, but I didn't say anything to these disrespectful twits. I was planning a complaint in my head to the meet 'n greet lady we met when we came in. To my surprise, the pastor mentioned how they (the staff) receive numerous complaint emails on a daily basis. It's like he's reading my mind. He referred to the authors of these emails as "Jesus party haters." Mmmmmm.

The message was not that bad at all, but it was totally directed for a 12 year old. Words and phrases heard during the sermon by the lead pastor: "crackhead," "dad-gum," and "I swear to God."

I realize how bad it is to talk badly about a church, I hope no one was offended. This church is doing good things. I just left feeling really annoyed and confused. Next...